Biz's BLOG
For Sensitive Wise Women
Resources and inspiration from Elizabeth Cush
People Pleasing and Perfectionism
If you were raised in a family that didn’t know and understand HSPs, the messages you often heard were to shut down or control your feelings, control the over-stimulation and overwhelm, don’t be so sensitive. But you are sensitive! It’s an integral part of who you are, and it’s not something that needs “fixing!”
High Sensitivity, Meditation, and Mindfulness
I needed tools to help me slow down, listen, to turn inward. That’s where mindfulness and meditation come in.
Caring for the Caregiver
Taking care of your nervous system — taking care of yourself while you care for others — is important.
Spiraling: In A Good Way
What if instead of getting caught up in distress of the experience, we start to notice each time we come back to that worry or devalued sense of worth. Like the spiral in my picture above of the horseshoe crab.
The Power of Self-Compassion
Those long-heard messages around being tough, not wallowing in your feelings, and moving on, have deep roots. So, doing things differently—giving myself care and kindness—takes a lot of practice. And can feel just as uncomfortable as the memories and feelings of trauma.
Life on Repeat
And each time you fall back into old patterns, behaviors, or ways of being you might wonder if this will ever end. You might be asking yourself, “Will there be a time when I don’t make the same mistakes, or think the same things, or do the same things?” Will I ever fully heal?”
Managing Transitions in Midlife
What might change if you could see the parts of you that frustrate, shame, or embarrass you as your inner child or infant? And if you knew that they were responding to stress from their childhood experiences, how would that change your relationship with those parts.
My Experience With IFS—internal Family Systems
The most basic assumption of IFS is that we all have parts. We are a system of parts that sometimes work well together and sometimes not so much. And at the core of our being we all have a Self. The loving, caring, compassionate, creative, curious Self.
Openness and Connection
If you’re highly sensitive, you have the innate gift of making deep connection with others. But if your sensitivity wasn’t fully understood by the people who raised you, you might have had to bury that gift under silence or other protective measures.
Mid-Life Introspection and Reflection
As you enter and move through midlife you might find you’re more curious and patient with yourself. And maybe new insights are arising. And if you have highly sensitive traits, you’re probably very attuned to your strengths and weaknesses already.
Feeling Overstimulated and Overwhelmed?
Do you get easily overwhelmed by having to make decisions, or projects that involve lots of steps? Or maybe looking ahead to a future event and everything that needs to happen between now and then feels impossible?
Why do bad things happen to good people?
The myth that bad things shouldn’t happen to good people conversely means that bad things should only happen to bad people. And that everyone is either good or bad. Is anyone of us one or the other.
Feeling Stuck and Unfulfilled: Longing for Deeper Connection
For highly sensitive women in midlife, you’re particularly attuned to your inner life and emotional experiences. But instead of feeling freeing, midlife can be overwhelming if you’re feeling unfulfilled, out of alignment, or just burned out.
Being Highly Sensitive is a Gift
Did you know that 15-20% of people are highly sensitive people (HSPs)? For years I attributed my high sensitivity to my anxiety. And I didn’t have a lot of compassion for when I felt overwhelmed or stressed out. I felt that I was the “problem.”
Managing The Discomfort of Indecision
When we sit with the discomfort—we don’t push it away, tell ourselves to move on or get over it—and we allow the feelings beneath the distress to surface, our intuition and insight can come forward.
When Empathy is Your Kryptonite
Helping others can feel good and very hard at the same time. We’re so attuned to other’s needs. We end up giving and giving, and that primes us for burnout.
Aging with Grace and Kindness
Imagine being able to accept that your body is just where it’s meant to be. And aging isn’t a judgement or failure.
The Gift of Self-Care
Making yourself a priority can be difficult anytime, but it's even harder during the holidays. This week, my post focuses on ways you can take care of yourself while managing the season's craziness.