This blog was adapted from my newsletter

Let’s Draw Back The Imposter’s Curtain

This week I’m talking about imposter syndrome. But, before you run away and hide, I’d love to explore it a little with you!

I like to imagine the Imposter like the Wizard in the Wizard of Oz. When Toto pulls back the curtain and he’s frantically pushing buttons for the sound, smoke and light effects, and he says, “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!”

Just like the Wizard, the Imposter makes you feel like you need to make a dazzling light show or a smoke screen to distract everyone’s attention away from you, because although you might look like you have it altogether, you really are a poser and at any moment everyone will find out.  

The Imposter can show up when you’ve begun to do or learn something new. Or when you’re putting yourself out into the world in a new way. And you worry about everything blowing up in your face when the imposter is revealed.

I remember being promoted to a managerial position when working at Bloomingdale’s many, many, many years ago (I was a young lass for sure). I’d worked hard to get there, and was so proud of myself, but the doubt started to creep in. The feeling of being an imposter flourished and grew.

I told myself that everyone knew I wasn’t as seasoned the other managers who’d been there for years.  And I convinced myself that all my colleagues felt I was unqualified for the job and resented me for the promotion. I kept this to myself and felt ashamed and fearful that other people would find out the truth about my lack of expertise. The Imposter kept me from seeking guidance or mentorship and I eventually quit the job that I loved.

What’s The Imposter Trying to Tell Us?

I can see now that although it was uncomfortable, because I felt unworthy and under-prepared, it shed a light on parts that needed some attention, some healing and some love. But I was too ashamed to sit with it them. I had worked hard and was prepared, and I needed some help. But I believed that asking for help, and sharing what I didn’t know, would expose me for the imposter I was.

No matter when or where the Imposter shows up for you— and it continues to show up for me— it’s a sign that it’s time for some internal work. Maybe it’s therapy to help you heal old wounds, or maybe it’s talking to a trusted friend or life coach to remind you of your strengths, so that you feel more empowered and confident.

When we talk about our feelings and ask for help and guidance it takes the Imposter out of the dark where it festers. Shining a light on the Imposter’s fears so they get the nutrients they need—love and compassion—helps to heal the Imposter so it can grow in new ways.

You don’t have to be held hostage by the worry and fear.

In my podcast conversation this week with Melody Wilding, business coach for sensitive strivers, we talk about imposter syndrome and her new book. She shared that Imposter Syndrome will show up when we’re pushing past our “what feels safe” boundaries and we’re stepping into new roles.  She encourages us to see it as a positive and very natural sign of growth!

Elizabeth Cush is a women’s life coach, a therapist, and the creator and host of the Woman Worriers and Awaken Your Wise Woman podcasts. She’s also the founder of Progression Counseling in Annapolis, Md and has been featured in these major publications. Elizabeth helps women bring forth their inner gifts and live with more authenticity, ease and purpose. Click here if you'd like to know more about working with Elizabeth.

Photo by @iankeefe—Unsplash